I Feel Abandoned:  A Conversation with Camille CategoriesConversations

I Feel Abandoned: A Conversation with Camille

Boomer Connections partner Camille LaCognata recently confided these words to the rest of the group: “I feel abandoned.”

Problem:

Camille recently lost her mother, who was 95 years old and had lived with Camille since 1988. Obviously, this was a huge life-altering event. Her only surviving sibling, a sister who lives locally, just left for an undetermined length of time to be with a daughter in Texas, whose husband is battling cancer. Her only other close relative, a nephew and his wife, both military, have recently been transferred to Germany. All of these changes happened at once. She lost her Dad and brother years before.

Understandably, Camille is feeling alone and struggling.

She has toyed with many ideas for change, pondering drastic measures. Do I sell my house and all my belongings and buy and RV and live on the road? When things look bleak, this is a very natural reaction, to chuck it all and make a drastic change.

“I have not cooked a meal in months. I have heated things up from freezer, but haven’t cooked since the end of June because there is no reason to,” said Camille. “I feel stupid that this is bothering me.” Sound familiar?

NO, we assured her, you are not being stupid!

We listened and pondered this problem and shared our insights and our own dilemmas and dark moments. Sadly, these challenges we have all dealt with this year are the moments that make up a life: Death, divorce, cancer. But..There are a lot of bright moments that make up a life too, and sometimes it is hard to remember this fact during the darker times.

Solution

Marie is a health coach and trainer. Cherie is a travel nut who can’t sit still for long.  We both agreed that sometimes a change of venue is enough to change your mindset. So, we asked Camille, what is something you like? “I really like walking,” she said.

Voila!

Here is what we came up with. Cherie proposed that we go on a grand tour of the Virginia State Parks and blog about it! Let’s get Camille out in a new, healthy venue, being active, surrounded by the beauty of nature.

So, stay tuned, here we go: Camille and Cherie are going on the road. And you know what: anyone, of any age, can do the same. Bad stuff happens, and the reaction is often to sink into inactivity and self-doubt. And sometimes there are no easy answers. But nature is free. Go take a walk, especially on one of these brilliant fall days, and maybe things will look a little brighter.

Cherie R. Blazer
By

Cherie is a late bloomer Boomer, born at the tail end of the Boomer generation. She was playing with Barbies while her older sisters marched on Washington and fought for equal rights, but watched and learned. Now she is an empty nester with a whole new future to explore and share at www.BoomerConnections.com! As “Philosopher in Chief” Cherie merely wants to change the world with this blog: to encourage those of us in the midst of our “second act” to look at life with new eyes, open to a life filled with new beginnings rather than endings, and to apply all we have learned to a way of living that is more meaningful and profound. There is SO much to live for, up until the very end.

2 comments

  1. Camille, so sorry to hear about your mom. I can understand how all these losses can make you feel as though you’ve been abandoned. Your plan to get out there and blog about VA state parks sounds like a great way to tweak your perspective.
    Take care,
    Lynne

  2. Camille, I have lost both my parents but I have a spouse and children to help me fill my void. I agree with Marie and Cherie, get out there and make your life better by getting involved with something you like doing. I look forward to reading about the parks you are going to be touring. Enjoy yourselves!
    Rita

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