Making New Friends: Episode 1 Yoga Class CategoriesThis Boomer's Life

Making New Friends: Episode 1 Yoga Class

One of my goals for 2018 is to seek out new friendships.  As empty nesters, we find some of our friends drifting away. Neighbors downsize and move. We no longer have the same connections with other parents through school activities. Kids have grown and flown. We drive into the old neighborhood every day with a bit of sadness and nostalgia, remembering all the block parties, all of the kids trick-or-treating together, dinner parties, Super Bowl parties, Oktoberfest, and even just getting together for drinks on the deck at the spur of the moment. It was the best of suburbia and we miss it. These were our people. But now it is time to stop moping and take action. Time to seek out a new path.

In this series, my Boomer Connections partners and I will reflect upon how we have made new friends. Here is my first foray:

I recently joined a fabulous gym in our area, ACAC. They offer a myriad of classes and I started checking out all those listed under “beginner.” The more advanced classes are way too hard-core for me, out-of-shape wimp that I am. I feel ridiculous flailing around in the back of a Step or Zumba class. The weights I can handle in Body Pump are pitiful. I feel like the 90 lb weakling featured in the back of the old comic books of the 60’s… although, thankfully, no one is kicking sand in my face! And so, I slowly gravitated to Yoga. To me it has always been simply meditative and peaceful stretching. I regard, with envy, the fact that many of my classmates seem to find something in it that I do not. Also, many of them seem to know each other and are buddies. I wondered, “How do I become a buddy?”

So…the other day, I tried out Aqua Yoga. It seemed hugely appealing, since I love being in the water. It is held in the warm saltwater pool at ACAC, which is truly like heaven on earth. I get there early so I can paddle around before anyone gets there so I can bliss out, imagining myself on a warm Caribbean beach. The instructor is a wonderful, exuberant man named Alec. He’s a fellow Baby Boomer who discovered yoga later in life. He took to it so strongly that he became an instructor. In addition to teaching at ACAC, he now has his own studio, SoCoYo Southern Comfort Yoga .

Alec, being the leader, got there early. I was the only one there, so I paddled up to say “Hey.” We got to talking. Because I was interested in finding out more about yoga, and because I asked a lot of questions, Alec talked. He is a talker, in the best possible way! Yoga is his passion and we had an enlightening conversation about it. He mentioned that he hosts an 8 AM Saturday yoga class in the studio upstairs. He also said that some of the regulars go out afterward for tea at the Whole Foods across the street from the gym. This particular Saturday after tea, they were planning to visit the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts (VMFA) to take in the East Asian exhibit hall and ponder the statues of Buddha. What? How cool is that?!!!

Was I interested? Well, heck yeah! So I turned up on Saturday and made my way to class, which I completely enjoyed. I’m starting to understand why yoga is good for both body and soul. Alec’s teaching style, irreverent and engaging, made us laugh, woke us up, and created a sense of camaraderie in the studio, full despite the early weekend hour.  Afterwards at Whole Foods, over a cup of holistic, organic, kindly harvested tea, Alec introduced me to some new friends. The group was composed of two women, Boomers around my age, Alec’s wife, who also teaches classes at ACAC, and a lovely young woman in her 20s. They were all so interesting.

Not surprisingly, we discussed yoga. I’m truly trying to understand why this practice becomes so meaningful to so many people. I wanted to know what they find in the practice beyond the simple stretching that so far I do not.  What is this “mind/body connection?” My two new Boomer friends revealed that they both, like Alec, got so into yoga that they took the in-depth course that allowed them to become instructors. It changed their lives. And like Alec, they were happy to answer my many questions about why yoga meant so much to them. They were so eager to share. Now I feel inspired to jump into yoga a little bit more to see what happens. Apparently, one of the premier yoga retreats in the country is right here in Virginia, appropriately named Yogaville. I’m planning to sign up for a retreat there sometime soon because it sounds absolutely fascinating. More on that later.

Make Friends - Yoga Class
Alec shares his wisdom

After tea, off we went to VMFA. We met at the East Asian hall and Alec walked us around the stunning statuary, talking about the origins and principals of yoga, riffing off the examples in the art. It was just beautiful. I felt a connection.

Making new friends has never been easy for me. It’s often challenging for me to reach out. But in this case, because I am so naturally curious and nosy (and always looking for something to discuss on the blog!), I couldn’t help but ask questions, and the rest just unfolded.

So, here’s the takeaway: To make new friends, just start asking questions!

How have you made new friends?

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Cherie is a late bloomer Boomer, born at the tail end of the Boomer generation. She was playing with Barbies while her older sisters marched on Washington and fought for equal rights, but watched and learned. Now she is an empty nester with a whole new future to explore and share at www.BoomerConnections.com! As “Philosopher in Chief” Cherie merely wants to change the world with this blog: to encourage those of us in the midst of our “second act” to look at life with new eyes, open to a life filled with new beginnings rather than endings, and to apply all we have learned to a way of living that is more meaningful and profound. There is SO much to live for, up until the very end.

2 comments

  1. Yes! Great blog Cherie! Thanks to my Mom I love yoga. She was a yoga teacher. (Not sure if you know that)
    She was a true renaissance woman for her time. An anamaly in the Hegins Valley she was a transplant from Ohio.
    Since my boys are grown I’ve been actively seeking ways to ‘make new friends’ to deal with the ‘emptiness’ of my nest.
    Loving your blog and will continue to share and be inspired!

    1. Love it! We call our contributors and commentors “Friends of Boomer” so Thank You Friend!! Ok this is cool: Your comment sparked a memory. When I was very young I remember my mom going off one day to attend a session someone in town was hosting about something called “yoga.” I was fascinated by what she told me about it and a book called Yoga and Meditation appeared in the house–I still have it, and it sparked a curiousity that never left me. I am pretty sure YOUR MOM was that someone!! Mrs Evelyn Artz was such a lovely woman, I remember her well.

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